Still 152

So I'm still at 152. Such failure, budget no more. I keep saying I'm gonna Do it and now's the time. My life is shit and I have almost no control in my life. But I can and will control my eating.

I need to get down in weight, time to drop all the fat off. Let my bones show.

I've already started back up on the kekwick diet. I'm on day 2 right now, finish this off then I'm gonna do the 2468. I'll need help I know who's up for assisting?

152

According to the morning weigh in, I am at 152 today. So down 14 Lb from the start.

Yesterday for some reason I just felt so... lonely. Out of nowhere, no friends over, nobody around, nothing to do... just bleh. I just looked forward to going to bed the whole day... mostly to see if I had lost weight the next day. And there it is, it's taking over my life and brain once again. No complaints.

I'm all the way back, no more fuck ups, the lies return. Oh I ate already, no I'm not hungry, I don't feel well, etc etc etc... And once again my grumbling gurgling churning stomache is the only sound to prove me wrong. If anyone listened for it. I haven't lost enough yet for anyone to take notice and worry, so that's working out for me.

And now I need to go say no to chicken nuggets and every condiment ever.
Laters, K

Another day

Another 0 cals. Once again tempted by friends and food. This time friends at my place and pizza was ordered. Smelled great, looked horrifying. I came close to giving in, but I was able to persevere thanks in part to my happiness of being able to say no, stick to it, and then feel better because everyone else had to eat.

I get a bit annoyed when someone hasn't eaten in more than two hours and all I hear is how they are "starving". Like they even know what its like to be starving, do they understand how your stomache feels after days without food. Nothing filling it except diet soda, water, and coffee. No. No they don't, and they won't.

They don't have the resolve to go without food. To set rules and live up to them. Simple rules really, demanding true... But simple.

Laters, K